My first pregnancy was delightful until it came time to give birth to my child. I had done everything right, diet, exercise, read all the parenting books, and made every prenatal appointment. I experienced no morning sickness; my hair was thick and luxurious, and I had a healthy pregnancy glow. I was ready to welcome my long-awaited bundle of joy into the world. My husband and I carefully wrote out our birthing plan, packed our hospital bag, and waited.
Before my daughter was born, I went to a scheduled prenatal appointment, where my doctor informed me of two things. I was contracting first, and the second I had protein in my urine, I was never told what that meant. My doctor instructed me to be at the hospital at five o'clock that even where they would induce labor. There was no other option given. I was 39 weeks and over being pregnant at this point, so I was not overly concerned.
We arrived at the hospital and ushered into a very sterile, unwelcome "birthing room," not one of the birthing suites we had viewed when we toured the hospital. The nurse told my husband and me that this was in the event of any complications. I immediately started to worry. What kind of difficulties could occur?!? My mind began to race back to all the negative stories that I had read and heard. I was frightened. A nurse entered with the standard paperwork for me to sign for my insurance, medical consent, etc. My parent's taught me never to sign anything without reading it first. As I am reading through this stack of paperwork, there is a medicine consent form. My birth plan, which the hospital has a copy of, states very clearly that I wanted a natural birth. Medication for pain management was not to be mention, except at my request. I questioned the now annoyed nurse about the form and explained to her what my wishes were. She once again stated that if I did not sign the consent form, I could not change my mind in the event of a complication —more talk of complications.
My doctor arrived and started the painful process of inducing labor. She left with a promise to check on me through the process. The hospital staff was not very empathetic and lacked compassion. Now, let me explain I have high pain tolerance, and I required very little assistance. However, it seemed that I had annoyed the nursing staff because I wanted to take control of my own birthing experience. My soft playing instrumental music was turned off by the nurse every time they walked into the room, and the lights were turned up to full brightness each time they entered the room. One of the nurses rudely informed me that my labor was not progressing; and that my blood pressure was rising. You don't say!
My doctor arrived the next morning and decided to rupture my membrane in the hopes that it would help labor to progress. It did not, and because my daughter's heart rate began to dip, they decided to perform a c-section. My birthing plan, my want, my voice all went out the window. I was only allowed to have my husband in the room as support. The doctor immediately cut the umbilical cord. I was not allowed to perform skin to skin with my daughter. Instead, she was held to my face for a moment while they finished the c-section procedure. I then was taken to the recovery room and her to the nursery; she also fed infant formula, which was also against my wishes. I was so discouraged by my care in this hospital that I checked out in less than 36 hours after giving birth.
I advise a woman to vet the doctors and hospitals well. Find someone that respects that you are in control of your pregnancy. I chose this birthing story because as a first time parent it is important to speak up for your desires.
In other countries like, Italy, women are informed and more in charge of their birthing options. There are two sets of nurses, one for the mother and one for the infant. The nursery are a virtual hangout spot for new mothers. It allows them to bond, with their infants while also connecting with other new moms.